The Titans

And yet another element which adds to this, occurred only a month after these experiences. And though it was stark and very unpleasant, it coincides with what happened shortly after Dionysus' birth. When the Titans, or gods of the old order—similar to the establishment—were set on murdering him (at Hera's instigation). And in his attempts to evade them, he went through several transformations. When they finally caught up with him, in the form of a bull, they tore him to pieces and boiled his flesh, and proceeded to eat him. But where his blood had fallen to the ground a pomegranate tree sprouted, a symbol of fertility, and he was later restored by his grandmother Rhea.

After the rebirth experience, I was amazed that it happened, and it occurred to me how similar it was to Revelation 12: where the woman gives birth to the child and flees into the wilderness. (vs 5-6) And I sensed it applied to me, specifically, and instinctively drew the correlation to the New Church. This was before I was familiar with Swedenborg's Apocalypse Revealed, though I'd already procured a copy, and before I was familiar with Dionysus. While in the same chapter it speaks of the war that ensues with Michael, and the Devil who gets cast out of heaven (vs 7-9) and persecutes the woman. (vs 12-13) And I drew up a symbol signifying this—two triangles hung on a cross, at first a hexagram, before being separated—and illustrated it in my mind; and tried to prepare myself for what seemed imminent. I don't know how accurate it was, but it proved to be effective.

I developed it towards the end of March and soon began having activity in my dreams. It all came to a head on April 1st, when I had a dream about a fallen spirit: and though he approached me as a friend, I sensed something very profane. He was full of lust, and it reminded me of burning flesh—from the inside. And I sensed something bad was going to happen, and became very distressed: "And when the dragon saw that he was cast unto the earth, he persecuted the woman which brought forth the man child." (Revelation 12:13) And I drove my truck up to the Russian River that day, close to where I had the rebirth experience, and tried to reconcile myself. But this spirit had so much influence over me, more of a close proximity, that I couldn't help but see through his eyes. And when I looked at the woods across the river, something which was of nature, that I used to hold in high esteem, it was like it was all on fire—and reminded me of excrement! Nor could I bear to look at it, for it felt like I was on fire, from the inside.